I’m a trans dad who gave birth to two sons. But our journey to this moment wasn’t what you might expect. For years, I truly believed that becoming a dad this way—on my own terms, in my own body—was just… impossible. I was told that by choosing to live authentically as myself, as a man, I was closing the door on this kind of parenthood forever. But my wife and I? We decided to find another way. This is the story of how I became a pregnant dad.
The Decision to Be a Pregnant Dad
Transitioning was the most clarifying experience of my life. It was finally aligning my body with the man I’ve always been inside. I found myself, I found peace, and I found the love of my life, my wife. Together, we built a home, a life… and we knew, without a doubt, we wanted a family. The only question was… how?
We went through all the options, but one idea just kept coming back to us: I still had the parts needed to carry a child. Honestly? The idea was daunting. Back in the early days of my transition, the thought of being pregnant would have been a nightmare. A total undoing of the man I’d fought so hard to become. But years later, comfortable in my own skin, the idea felt different. It felt… possible.
Then one night, my wife just looked at me and said, “What if you did it? What if you carried our baby?” And right then, in that moment, the fear was just… gone. It was replaced by this overwhelming desire to be a father, in every sense of the word. We decided to go for it.
The Journey
The first step was pausing my testosterone. That was tough. My body started changing in ways I hadn’t dealt with in years. My period came back, and with it, this wave of gender dysphoria that was just… really hard to manage. It felt like I was going backward, and I had to keep reminding myself, over and over, why I was doing this.
We decided to try conceiving the natural way. It wasn’t a quick process. For nine long months, we tried. Each month was a cycle of intense hope followed by the disappointment of it not happening. It was emotionally draining, and there were times we wondered if it ever would.
After nine months of trying, the day came to take a test. I remember my hands were shaking so bad. I put the test on the counter, and we just… waited. And then… we saw two lines. Positive. We were pregnant. The pure, unfiltered joy of that moment after so much waiting… I’ll never, ever forget it.
My pregnancy was this weird mix of total joy and real pain. I was so excited to be a dad, but the physical changes were a constant battle with dysphoria. My face softened, my hips got wider, and I was getting misgendered all the time out in public. But then you see that first ultrasound… you hear that tiny heartbeat… and it grounds you. It reminds you exactly what this is all for.
If our story is hitting home for you, I’d love it if you’d subscribe and follow along as we figure out this whole ‘new family’ thing.
The Birth of My First Son
The birth itself was the most intense and empowering thing I’ve ever done. My medical team was incredible—they used respectful language and treated me with the kind of dignity every parent deserves. It wasn’t without complications, though, and there were moments where I was just completely overwhelmed. But the second I heard that first cry, everything else just melted away. They placed our son on my chest, and in that instant, I wasn’t a pregnant person, or a trans man, or a patient anymore. I was just… a dad. Holding my child for the first time, I knew every single hard moment had been worth it.
I wanted to share our story for anyone out there who feels like their road to parenthood doesn’t fit the ‘normal’ script. It’s so easy to feel isolated, but I promise you, you’re not alone. Being what some of us in the community call a ‘seahorse dad’ is definitely a unique journey, but it’s a completely valid one. It is absolutely possible to create the family you’ve been dreaming of, on your own terms. This whole journey taught me that my identity as a man isn’t fragile. It’s not defined by what my body can or can’t do. It’s defined by my heart. And right now, my heart is completely full.
I’d love to hear your thoughts or your own stories in the comments. And hey, don’t forget to subscribe for more of our family’s adventures.
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