Transitioning is a deeply personal journey, and it looks different for every transgender person. We each decide who to tell, when to come out, and what changes to pursue. While this post isn’t solely about my transgender transition, my transition choices have significantly influenced my pregnancy and parenting experiences. That’s why sharing my transition timeline is important.
Coming Out: Family and Friends
I first came out as transgender at the end of 2019, when I was 21. Although I realized I wasn’t cisgender at 18, I didn’t come out immediately because I was still figuring out exactly what that meant for me. I knew I disliked being referred to as my birth sex and was uncomfortable with certain aspects of my body. After years of reflection, I identified as a transgender man and decided to come out publicly and begin my medical transition.
The first people I told were my sister and cousin. They are the closest family members to me, so it made sense to start with them. My cousin had already been questioning their own gender identity in high school, and my sister and I are identical twins who share a strong bond. I was nervous about how coming out might affect our relationship, but both were accepting and supportive.
Next, I came out to my closest friends, particularly those in the LGBTQ+ community. Some I told in person, others via letters, and the rest through text messages. Everyone was supportive, which helped me gain confidence before coming out at work.
At work, coming out was relatively easy. I informed my boss and the business owner and asked for support regarding pronouns and my medical transition. My colleagues were receptive, and I gradually shared my new name and pronouns with the rest of the team.
Coming out to my extended family was more complicated. I told my stepdad over the phone shortly before my top surgery. My dad found out via text, and while he expressed love and support, he initially struggled with using my correct name and pronouns. Over time, most family members responded positively, resulting in a generally supportive environment.
Starting My Medical Transition
After coming out to friends, family, and colleagues, I began the medical transition process. For my transgender transition the first step was therapy, starting on January 8, 2020. I worked with a therapist experienced in supporting transgender individuals. While the initial goal was obtaining a letter for top surgery, I found therapy helpful for personal growth as well.
I scheduled my top surgery consultation and procedure with Dr. Charles Garramone. My surgery took place on March 3, 2020, and the results were life-changing. Less than a month later, on March 30, 2020, I began hormone replacement therapy (HRT) with testosterone through Planned Parenthood using an informed consent model. The changes to my body were immediate and affirming.
Resuming HRT After Parenthood
After having my two children, I decided to restart testosterone in October 2024. Within two months, my periods stopped, and I began noticing physical changes like increased strength, facial hair growth, and more masculine features. Seeing myself in the mirror as the man I truly am has been incredibly affirming.
Looking Ahead: Health and Fitness
In the coming years, my focus will shift toward health and fitness. I want to feel strong, confident, and energetic—a positive role model for my sons as they grow into young men. Transitioning is not just about physical changes; it’s about becoming the person I am meant to be.
